smoking cessation in t-7days!

i'm super stoked about it!

it's really hard to be in a relationship and decide you want to quit when the other isn't ready. it's very difficult when one is overly dependant on the habit as their primary stress reliever when they have a very stressful every day life. that being said, now that summer has begun and classes are over, we're starting the journey. i hate to say anything about until i can actually mark a true progress, however i am excited.

i realize the health risks associated with that damned ole' nicotine and all 87 additives in each manufactured cig. it's more than that. when we're around people who don't smoke, i feel a bit selfish constantly going outside or walking away from a group. it makes me a little self-conscious to have such a noticeable addiction. a lot of people have addictions that are easily hidden and therefore they're less likely to be so readily judged.

i hope it sticks. i really do. the physiological addiction to cigarettes rivals that of herion. if people can quit that, i hope i can forever quit smokes. the true test will be bar-hopping and chillin' with the buds that continue to light up. i think if we can truly use each other as the primary support system, we can work our way through it.

arghhhh

i need someone that is willing to be a true buddy. i've been trying to focus on weight loss, as well as toning what i've already got. i'll do really well, and start to see results and then i will sabotage everything in ONE week end. one! how is that even possible?

it doesn't help that i live with someone who really just doesn't care. he doesn't have any desire to modify his eating habits, thereby affecting me. i know he's being thoughtful when he picks me up something at the store, but that thoughtful zinger will only push me further into the throes of dietary despair.

i need someone who would be around, starting friday at about 6:00, to smack me on the nose with a newspaper any time i pick up something i shouldn't. like that 5th plate of chinease buffet food.